KICKIN' AND SCREAMIN'...........

The twig eatin’, tofu fartin’, lily livered, Prius driving, America-hating, bleeding heart liberal, blinkered, Starbucks drinking, elitist, can’t-we-all-just-get-along, granola eating, namby-pamby, Birkenstock wearing, tree hugging, long haired, pansy-assed, kumbaya-singing, Earth First, bed-wetting, patchouli wearing, dirty, smelly, dope smoking, bongo playing, arm pit haired women and feminized, armpit shaved men crying “Mother Earth is Gaia,” tortured “artiste” types won’t be satisfied until we’re all living in caves again chucking spears (no pun intended against the current White House resident so don’t get your panties in a wad) at wild animals and eating them cold because fire emits carbon dioxide.

The latest? Soft toilet paper.

The tenderness of the delicate American buttock is causing more environmental devastation than the country’s love of gas-guzzling cars, fast food or McMansions, according to green campaigners. At fault, they say, is the US public’s insistence on extra-soft, quilted and multi-ply products when they use the bathroom.

“This is a product that we use for less than three seconds and the ecological consequences of manufacturing it from trees is enormous,” said Allen Hershkowitz, a senior scientist at the Natural Resources Defence Council.

“Future generations are going to look at the way we make toilet paper as one of the greatest excesses of our age. Making toilet paper from virgin wood is a lot worse than driving Hummers in terms of global warming pollution.” Making toilet paper has a significant impact because of chemicals used in pulp manufacture and cutting down forests.

They go so far as to say we should use “washable wipes”

How likely would you be to use any towel in that house knowing these moonbats wash the towels they wipe their asses with?

I’ll tell you what. For those that get offended by this, I recommend they all stop using toilet paper and go “green.” Like this:

Then again, Barack HUSSEIN Obama, The-Quicker-Fucker-Upper, will probably introduce something into his budget plan to make the country more green and create jobs…..by mandating bidets in all households. That way there’d be no towels to wash. Of course, that’ll get the water conservation nuts in an uproar and they’ll be demanding tax incentives for recycling rain barrels and re-routing THAT water to the bidets.

UPDATE: Thanks to OCM: